Exactly one year after I lost one of the last things I felt defined me, it has been restored beyond what I could have imagined!
A year after such a humiliating loss, I now find myself often praying, “God, I love my hair! You are so good to me!!”
Seriously, I have never liked it more, but I first had to give praise through the loss and through the tears to keep Satan from winning. He did EVERYTHING he could to try to destroy me in 2022 and 2023, but praise is a powerful weapon…especially through tears and uncertainty.
I wrote about this last year in “Satan Done Gone and Attacked Mah Herr” which I’m happy to say readers found funny and some could relate to my sudden feeling of identity loss.
But there’s more! Not only did I have to choose to sing and declare, “If You choose to give, or You choose to take, I will still choose praise” but God had another test for me.
Silver hair! (I refuse to call it gray...silver is classier.)
My black hair began to be infused with silver when I was 27. In My Twenties! I began to turn gr…silver in my twenties! Nope! Not happening! I refused! That was way too early, but as I write this I’m reminded that 27 was the pivotal year God decided it was time for me to return to Him.
So for almost 25 years, I dyed it. In 2020 the Lord tried showing me a scripture that says something about silver hair being a sign of wisdom, or something, and began to bug me about letting it grow out.
So I tried….and soon that ugly line of demarcation began really annoying me.
The man I was dating at the time innocently said, “I wonder what your hair would look like if it was all black…” and, well, that was just perfect timing!!
I dyed it again and it no longer annoyed me…and I think he might have even felt honored a bit.
After we broke up, I tried again…and got annoyed again…and dyed it again.
In December of 2023, I began to be reminded that God wanted me to grow it out, but ugh…how do I deal with that stupid ugly contrast between black and silver that makes me either look too lazy or too poor to keep up with my hair? It’s not cute! Not one bit!
I was on the phone with a friend, who has BEAUTIFUL silver hair, discussing my latest attempt to grow mine out when I heard the Lord say, “You’ve given me everything else, but you haven’t trusted me with your hair, yet.”
Crap! He was right! I was still holding on to that, even though that part of my identity had been stripped away when it was all suddenly and haphazardly chopped off that summer.
“Okay, fine! You’re right! I’ll commit to this no matter what it takes or how awful it looks. My hair is Yours.” I determined.
Maybe a pixie cut was what was in order to just get it over with. So many people had reminded me how hair works, when mine had been chopped away, and that it grows back. I guess I could just suck it up and go through an even shorter chop…because hair grows back. (Yeah, we all know hair grows back! That’s not comforting! LOL!)
My regular hair stylist was not up for this pixie thing at all. Not at all! I have to say I agreed with her, but she was having surgery on her hand and would not be able to do anything to try to make me pretty until the next spring anyway. I really didn’t know what to do. I wondered if I could rock being bald for a bit. Yeah, probably not!
Not long after I committed my hair to God, Christmas came along and I was in Coeur d’ Alene, Idaho where I knew almost no one. I was having dinner alone at a really nice restaurant, thanks to my wonderful cousin, and I was sitting at the bar, when an attractive couple sat down next to me. I didn’t pay much attention until the lady began talking to me.
When I responded, I noticed she had THE MOST AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL SILVER HAIR EVER!!! I had to interrupt myself to tell her this and, guess what!!! Her response was, “Well, I’m a colorist and stylist, so come visit me.” I was pretty certain God put this stunning, silver-haired, stylist on my path for a reason so I made an appointment as soon as I could.
Julie made it her mission to make my hair as pretty as possible during the short time I was in Coeur d’ Alene and she was aggressive about it. She did things I was told by other stylists were impossible and, after each of the 4 times I got to visit her, I felt prettier and prettier. I have never loved my hair more!
And even as the silver roots grow out, they blend so well with what Julie did and I really am amazed with what God blessed me with as soon as I committed my hair to Him. He restored what was stolen a year ago and made it so much better.
So, take that, Satan!!! I told you my God would turn what you meant to crush me, even further than you already had, into something that would bring Him glory!
Revenge of the Herr